Friday, February 13, 2009

Valentine's Day Plans (Gender Equality Part 2)

This is the Part 2 of the Gender Equality blog posts. You can view Part 1 here and Part Zero here.

Last night I met a girl. Let's call her Amy for now...

...mostly because that's her name.

Background: Pomer and Amy are discussing the cons and cons of online date sites when Pomer makes a very predictable move...

...or does he? (queue music).

Pomer: "So, do you have any Valentine's Day plans with your boyfriend?
Amy: "...I don't have a boyfriend."
Pomer: (nice) "Do you have any Valentine's Day plans at all?

(3 seconds pass as she considers the question)

Amy: "Um... I'm going to The Vagina Monologues."
Pomer: (...nice?) "Oh, so you're a feminist?"
Amy: "I guess..."
Pomer: "Great. Do you want to be my Valentine's Date?"

(5 seconds pass as she considers the question)

Amy: "Um...sure?"
Pomer: "Perfect. How about this, I'll cook a meal and you pay for it all."
Amy: "Why would I pay for it?"
Pomer: "Because you want women's equality and so do I. We're just switching roles for the night."

(Amy looks confused)

Amy: "But wouldn't it be more equal if we split it?"
Pomer: "Fine. Let's have our date, I'll see how it goes, maybe call you back, wait two hours after you text me to respond, and if we make it to a second date, I'll consider paying... but probably won't."
Amy: "That sounds horrible."
Pomer: "Doesn't it?"

(Amy is visibly frustrated)

Amy: "I see what you're doing. Fine. Here's my number. Call me tomorrow and we'll see what happens."

End dialogue.

What happens:

Dinner will be waiting for her when she gets back from The VMs tomorrow night.

I hope she likes Mexican because I used to work at Qdoba and that's the only thing I can cook.

This is going to be the best Valentine's Day ever.

Thank you equality.

1 comment:

Daniel said...

Sick, honesty really is the best policy.